December 8th 2005

“Okay, stay calm and breathe” that’s me talking to Kristy. Since we had to drive to the hospital for our tour this evening, I thought I would practice a bit. I set the mileage counter on my car so we could see how far we actually are from our house to the hospital, 8.7 miles and roughly 15-17 minutes depending on weather conditions and traffic. There are about six or seven stoplights on the route, but most of the driving is freeway, all the lights are just before the hospital except for one to get on the freeway.

We arrived at the hospital and started looking at the parking for when we have to rush in and for when visitors want to come see us. We walked passed the family birthing center and into the main lobby and waited. Eventually the tour guide came through finishing up the tour before ours and then came and waited with us. It looked like we might get a private tour, but at the last minute a second couple with three daughters, eight, nine and twelve showed up. There was some mix up over the phone and only kids ten and over were allowed on the tour, the guide asked if we cared and Kristy and I didn’t have any problem with it, so the little girls were allowed to tour.

We went back out into the freezing, back to the family birthing center, “this is where you will enter after you call first and these doors are always open, even if it’s 3:00 AM”, I was hoping it wouldn’t be 3:00 AM. The guide also said that we should not use cell phones or activate car alarms inside the building. I guess if you try to turn your car alarm on or off from inside the family birthing center it activates the facility alarm. It was explained to us that lights will flash, alarms will sound, the building will lock down and very quickly security will close in on all building entrances. The guide said it happens ridiculously fast so that is comforting that they have decent security. Continuing on went in and took the first right, about ten feet down the hall is the main nurses station, which is where we will check in and where all the fetal monitors are.

I asked about hospital registration and the guide so that we mail in the forms, at which time Kristy told me we already had them at home, I was thinking “well thanks for telling me about them”. So, we have to fill those out and program the appropriate family birthing center call in number to each of our cell phones.

We continued down the hall and she showed us a birthing bar that can be used for the squatting position. She said someone would be on hand to install it for us if we needed, but it’s pretty simple, the bar fits into two round slots, one on each side of the bed so the bar goes across the bed. Then you screw in the clamps to hold the bar firmly in place, the same way a Christmas tree stand works.

Next we went into one of the Labor Delivery Observation and Recover (LDOR) birthing suites. Each room had a personal bathroom with shower, tub with jets and toilet, plenty of storage, a television, a bench / sleeping area for significant others and a phone with a direct dial in line. All in all a pretty standard room, very similar to the other two hospitals we had visited recently for the births of my nephew and niece. There was also a standard bassinet with warming pad.

The guide showed us the Toko Transducer which is an ultrasonic sensor used to monitor the mother’s contractions. Piezoelectric ultrasonic Toko Transducers are used to monitor bats, just an FYI. Then we got to see the familiar ultrasound Doppler t which is used to measure the baby’s heart rate and see how the baby is responding to the stress of the contractions. Both monitors are held on by a belt that is reminiscent of Batman’s utility belt or a weight lifters back brace.

Our guide said that background music is highly recommended and there is a place for plug in CD players but they prefer battery powered CD players, “be sure to bring more then one CD in case you have a long delivery”. I was thinking, “lady, welcome to the age of ipods, we’ll be brining hundreds of CDs in a little tiny form factory with a customized labor and delivery play list”. Kristy told me a little later that she was thinking the exact same thing.

Bath, weight, measurements, everything would be done in the room. I stand on the side and they toss the baby up to use as soon as it’s out. The philosophy is to keep the family together at all times. The baby never leaves the room unless there is a complication, then the baby goes to its own private room in the locked down nursery and may be accompanied at all times by one or both of the parents. If a Cesarean section (C-section) is done, right after the baby is born it is handed to the significant other while mom finishes up the surgery, then they all go together to their LDOR as a family.

There are also some standard hospital rooms near the nursery. If a baby has to go to the nursery the parents are given the option of staying in one of these smaller rooms so they can be closer to the nursery. A cot can be rolled in for the significant other to sleep on. Yeah, I was thinking that too, “That’s not as good as the built in one in the standard LDOR”.

Kristy asked if there was any limit to the number of people present in the LDOR during birthing, the fire code is eight, so you could have that many but it’s not recommended because it becomes like a circus. In my mind I was thinking “Yes, photo and video crews have been approved”. Of course Kristy won’t allow my crews in and I don’t know if I really want all that anyways, I’m sure I can take plenty of pictures myself or Kristy’s dad can snap some Napoleon Dynamite glamour shots!

There are regular meals for mom, dad must fend for himself. I’m hoping we are in the hospital on a Monday, then my friend Bryan can bring me something after he plays basketball (at a church just down the street). Or maybe he could pick me up, I could play too and then get something to eat and back to the hospital? Probably not, I’m thinking that wouldn’t go over well with Kristy.

As we were leaving we went out of the family birthing center entrance that is connected to the hospital, right next to the main hospital lobby where we started. On our way out I noticed the “Resident Sleeping Room” and I thought of Alex and Olivia and all those whacky crew members on Grey’s Anatomy. Later in the car Kristy said she saw it too and she thought of Christina and Preston (a.k.a. Burke), also from Grey’s Anatomy. Yes, we watch too much television; we already know we have a problem. We also noticed that there is a coffee / espresso stand in the lobby of the main hospital, good news for you visitors!